Wednesday, March 16, 2011

My Melodic Communiqué

Childhood/ School:

- The sound of wind when I first learnt about the word breeze
- The sound of allah-ho-akbar early in morning @ 5.10 that woke me up to dress for school
- … of trucks moving on early winter mornings made me think how people start working from the wee hours of the day (just like me :)
- … of those footsteps of the neighbour’s guard who would steal flowers from my garden, I used to listen him walking, from the loo
- … of my school bus’ horn honking from a range of 200 meters at 6.15 am
- … of fart in a silent class
- … of rough chalk running on the blackboard to create immense irritation to ears
- …of Principal’s stick on disobeyed hands accompanied with an echo sound ‘Why don’t you Talk in English’
- … of dusters banging the desks ordering ‘Keep Quiet’
-… of those 10 statue bells smacked by the peon to control the chaotic movements and sounds made after lunch followed by pin drop silence.
- … of that sabziwali calling out everyone and the little me sneaked out from my old home in Civil Lines that got replaced with a posh society without any street vendors
- …of that unripe little mango mistakenly dropped down while plucking from the tree to make a thump on neighbour’s tin sheet in those naughty summer afternoons
- … of the pages of a book flipping by the winds at the time of evening terrace studying

Adolescence/ Profession/ Post engagement:

- The sound of the peon in our media institute calling from the classroom’s window to the hostel’s room ‘Sir agaya’
- The sound of the insect on a lonely night on the top of the hostel’s terrace
- … of Richa’s bold voice waking me up ‘Tina chal khadi ho ja’
- …of the boss calling out your name in front of the staff giving you goose bumps
- … of chat message that popped up always at the wrong time when boss is around
- … of typing, printing and murmuring in a newspaper office
- … of the train crossing by from nearby lane @ 3 am registering its presence
- … of the guard’s whistles forcing me to keep awake @ 3.15 am
- … of the chirp made by the birds sitting outside my window asking to be fed
- … of my phone ringing after a long wait for two little words ‘Love Morning’
- … of my sister’s old Luna that I wanted to be silenced with a scooty
- … of kids howling in the society on a holiday eve
- … of the cat under my bed in labour pain
- … of that old fan mocking from above when I used to rest in my father’s office
- … of chaiwala in an overcrowded compartment of a train
- … of silence while meditating with a group of 25000 people

Post Wedding:
- The sound of his snores on first night…
- The sound of the pressure cooker’s whistles calling me to put it off knob
- … of the alarming wake-up alarms of really early mornings
- … of the out stationed husband over the phone who’s half asleep
- … of the FM blaring from the father-in-law’s room
- … of silence in the empty summer afternoons
- …of half hanging newspapers stuck on the glass slider of a new house waiting for curtains
- … of the doorbell and continuous scary knocks, when I am unwilling to open the door in a lonely flat.
- …of the elevator reaching my bedroom tearing all the doors and window panes

- The sound of my father scolding someone that threatens the victim to pee in his pants
- The sound of my dad’s vehicle that always told me about his arrival and that I have to switch to the study table
- … of the mild shivering cries of the new born baby at my home
- … of my brother’s limping footsteps he took before getting bedridden
- … of that scream just before bhai used to go into fits
- … of his coughing I heard on his last day while leaving for office
- … of my mom’s sobs over the phone after bhai was gone
- … of my father’s rare laugh

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Clearly Cluttered!

At first I thought it's a writer's block again, but I draft a post almost daily on different topics and the moment I try adding more words to a post, there're other things that arrests my mind. They say, we should also be written. I decided to wait and write this first.

I have experienced and heard about writer's block but I don't know what term is it for what am experiencing now..may be Writer's Fix...? I don't know. It's like I have so much to write about, so much to share, but the output is a drafted incomplete post longing to get published. Though my diary gets updated almost every 3rd day, am stiffly reading books of various genre, am not watching much of movies lately, am travelling a lot to observe and experiment more about things and people, that way I must have so much to write on. But still going no where.

What's it called?? Is there a specified term?

Well, I think writer's block is better than the current situation, atleast there you are on a break to spend time with blankness, here you feel so clearly cluttered that you know what you want to write i.e on various topics at the same time but then you end up with nothing solid to be served!
This makes me feel so incomplete and full of guilt. Every morning before opening the laptop I decide to finish atleast one post, I open the document, re-read it, think, write 2-3 lines and close it suddenly to write on yet another new topic.

And see, now on the spur of the moment I believe I have got the solution to this mind says, the only way to come out of it is, in stead of starting with something new, finish writing the ones that are facing the pause and then start afresh :)

Alright then, am back to finish writing!!